Document: draft-ietf-geopriv-l7-lcp-ps-09.txt
Reviewer: Sean Turner
Review Date: 2009-05-29
IETF LC End Date: 2009-06-09
IESG Telechat date: (not known)

Summary: This draft is basically ready for publication, but has nits that should be fixed before publication.


Nits/editorial comments:

Abstract: Spell out 1st occurrence of SIP

1.1: r/This document is structured as follows./This remainder of this document is structured as follows.

Figure 1: r/|Customer Premises Network  |/| Customer Premises Network |

3: Spell out 1st occurrence of DSL

3: r/Wimax/WiMAX

3: r/WiMax/WiMAX

3.1: Spell out 1st occurrence of DHCP, NIC, PPPoe, VoIP, LAN, VPN

3.2: Spell out 1st occurrence of IP

Figure 2: There are two "Host B" boxes.  Should one be B' (i.e., Host B
moved?)

4 & 5: r/They do not in any way mean that their is consensus that any of these approaches are good or bad or that the IETF is in any recommended in this document that any of these be used./They do not in any way mean that their is consensus that any of these approaches are good or bad or that the IETF is in any way recommending that any of these be used.

4: r/or in access network/or in [the/an?] access network

4: Spell out 1st occurrence of FQDN, DNS, SRV, NAPTR, STUN

4: Is there a reference for how to thwart the noted security issues?

5: Spell out 1st occurrence of MAC, ATM, VCI, VPI, VC, DSLAM, VDSL, CDP,
  RADIUS,

5: Is there a reference for the "TR-069v2 DSL Forum document"?

5: Is there a reference for how to thwart the noted security issues (e.g., a pointer to link layer protection mechanisms)?

6: Not sure I understand this ", to devices that can change attachment points with the impact that their IP address is changed, to devices that do not change their IP address while roaming".  What's the "with the impact that their" about?

6 VPN: r/LIS used by the client/LIS used by the VPN client

6: Spell out 1st occurrence of NSIS, NATFW, NSLP

6: r/[19] ./[19].